tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post114290432397323169..comments2023-04-29T14:04:55.642+01:00Comments on The RAM Raider: Another Awful Review, And A Press ReleaseRAM Raiderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13574276353332030515noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-87685172338649718882006-11-02T18:19:00.000+00:002006-11-02T18:19:00.000+00:00I love Animal Crossing
and I love this review.
I...I love Animal Crossing<br /><br />and I love this review.<br /><br />It sums up the possibilities and experiences of playing the game perfectly.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143769058354715292006-03-31T02:37:00.000+01:002006-03-31T02:37:00.000+01:00That is quite honestly one of the worst pieces of ...That is quite honestly one of the worst pieces of self-indulgent wankery I've ever read. I love Animal Crossing, I can see what he's trying to get across, but fucking HELL... <BR/><BR/>I'm not quite sure why anyone's defending this, least of all John Walker. RR may disagree (as twats are wont to do), but you're better than this shit. Quite a lot better,at that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143284325008077902006-03-25T10:58:00.000+00:002006-03-25T10:58:00.000+00:00There's more than one Anonymous here, BTW. Just co...There's more than one Anonymous here, BTW. Just couldn't be buggered to fill out more fields.<BR/><BR/>But as the other Mr Anonymous says, he should restrict this to his MySpace profile. Let him have fun in his own time and not make me cringe to near vomitting when I'm simply reading a review. The only other industry that accepts this crap is the wine industry and only because there's often bollocks-all else to say so they have to flower it up.<BR/><BR/>I have played Animal Crossing. I love Animal Crossing. I don't like this review.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143245986460743542006-03-25T00:19:00.000+00:002006-03-25T00:19:00.000+00:00Well, "anonymous", I can. He's having fun, and it'...Well, "anonymous", I can. He's having fun, and it's rather sweet.<BR/><BR/>Read in context, it makes sense. It's the conclusion to the story told in the review.<BR/><BR/>But more to the point: in Animal Crossing you <I>can</I> write her name in the stars, and send her a loveletter.<BR/><BR/>What goes over the heads of so many literary-luddites is quite how appropriately that paragraph conveys the game. It is a ridiculously fey affair - a game about planting flowers and writing pretend letters. Mathew encapsulates the tone exactly, in a far more effective and evocative manner than the back-of-the-box crappery people are more used to.<BR/><BR/>However, if someone doesn't like the paragraph (and I'd say fairly inevitably, that would be someone who hasn't understood the game), then fine. You didn't like a paragraph. Did the review fail? In no way. So what the flowering-fuck are people bleating about? Back to my previous conclusions.<BR/><BR/>Can't wait to see someone who aimlessly shouts about how it's all so difficult for them with their own name.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143197188047554862006-03-24T10:46:00.000+00:002006-03-24T10:46:00.000+00:00i agree. that eurogamer review of animal crossing ...i agree. that eurogamer review of animal crossing was absolute bollocks. i gave up reading it after a few paragraphs and read the one on spong.com instead which the reviewer didn't write while giving himself a blowjob.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143154873326899412006-03-23T23:01:00.000+00:002006-03-23T23:01:00.000+00:00They can be imaginative in their myspace profile. ...They can be imaginative in their myspace profile. A game review ought to tell a potential buyer what the hell the game is like. It shouldn't read like a Terry Pratchett novel.Jonnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00234332581785318276noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143146398859203172006-03-23T20:39:00.000+00:002006-03-23T20:39:00.000+00:00No, John, it IS utter tosh. It really is.No, John, it IS utter tosh. It really is.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1143033878011626712006-03-22T13:24:00.000+00:002006-03-22T13:24:00.000+00:00Come, come John. Surely even you can't defend the ...Come, come John. Surely even you can't defend the finale? It's Animal Crossing he's talking about!<BR/>What next? A 6000-word thesis on the original Frogger, and how it's actually an allegory of the state of modern capitalism.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1142976428833499972006-03-21T21:27:00.000+00:002006-03-21T21:27:00.000+00:00I don't think there's any question (and I'm not su...I don't think there's any question (and I'm not sure of which I grow more tired - saying this most obvious of statements, or defending fucking NGJ as if it's a big deal to describe a gaming experience in the first person) that a review that *replaces* information of a game's quality with anecdotal experiences is a review that has failed.<BR/><BR/>It isn't true of Mathew's, it isn't true of Tom Francis' Oblivion review, and it isn't true of any other example RR has cited so far.<BR/><BR/>Let us challenge those reviews that fail to deliver the necessary information (and if I have failed, please point this out to me so I can do better - I post under my own name for a reason), but can we stop these pathetic pram-based tantrums because we're scared of someone's being imaginative? (Or, as I suspect is rather more likely, panicking at the realisation that lazy back-of-the-box-with-a-score-at-the-end hackery is no longer going to be good enough).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1142956086083167182006-03-21T15:48:00.000+00:002006-03-21T15:48:00.000+00:00It's hardly one review in every two hundred. There...It's hardly one review in every two hundred. There are a startling number of reviews coming out every week that skate around the actual quality of a game and bang on about growing a beard, smearing your face in dog shit and hiding in a bush, waiting to leap out and stab someone with your level 782 dagger of doom.Jonnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00234332581785318276noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1142940535806921122006-03-21T11:28:00.000+00:002006-03-21T11:28:00.000+00:00He doesn't send me press releases anymore because ...He doesn't send me press releases anymore because I kept sending corrected versions back at him in RED FONT with SEE ME at the end.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11948138.post-1142931834578056202006-03-21T09:03:00.000+00:002006-03-21T09:03:00.000+00:00"Man alive, we couldn’t make this shit up."No, you..."Man alive, we couldn’t make this shit up."<BR/><BR/>No, you really couldn't, could you?<BR/><BR/>Here's what makes the least sense: it's one review, of a game in which you're asked to simply exist, to have experiences. So Mathew describes some experiences. And yes, he has some fun with it, makes it flowery.<BR/><BR/>Obviously your rage makes no sense. If a site or magazine were writing every review this way, and you found it obfuscatory, then your complaint would make sense. But one review in every two hundred having an experiential account of something that *the reviewer experienced*, making you so angry? There's another cause.<BR/><BR/>I think it might come down to:<BR/><BR/>"Man alive, we couldn’t make this shit up."<BR/><BR/>For a blog that was supposed to reveal the terrible truths of the games industry, don't you think it's a bit lame to spend your time slagging off people who write better reviews than yours?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com