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    Wednesday, April 04, 2007

    Edge = Spineless Fucks

    Reading Edge is wrong on so many levels, there literally isn’t room on the whole of the web to list them. The pretentious prick-fest that calls itself monthly journalism is getting a lot of attention at the moment because they’ve been even more spineless than usual. And that’s saying something.

    Former Digitiser editor Paul Rose / Mr. Biffo usually writes the only page of the “mag” that’s even close to readable every month, and is always refreshingly free of penis-sucking platitudes and over-use of Word’s “Synonyms” option to pick the longest words. This month, Edge has seen fit to pull his monthly opinion page because he commits the unforgivable sin of telling an amusing story about how Sony husk Phil Harrison hijacked a Marillion concert by turning it into a corporate plug for the despicable PS3, contrary to Future Publishing Commandment “Though shalt not biteth the cocketh that fucketh our readers in the arseth for money. Eth.”

    Recognising that reporting the truth about Sony cunts and their ridiculous antics is what proper journalists do, Paul has published the article on his excellent blog.

    So now you can hate Sony and their nosediving sales figures and read the only readable page in Edge without having to buy it / hang around a newsagent / fish it out the office bin right now, for free. Future, in the meantime, are safe to carry on selling the varnished covers of not-very-popular-in-terms-of-reader-figures-despite-what-they-make-out Edge for another month.


    1. That PS3 supplement that Edge wrote a few months ago was terrifying. In the first couple of pages it was going on about the "limitless potential" and how Microsoft were "running scared". And that cover looks especially suspicious now...

    2. Anonymous7:50 pm

      It's hard for poor Future.

      One the one hand it has to keep Sony happy as it does the official PS3 mag, but it also has to keep MS happy as it does the official Xbox 360 mag. And Nintendo. And they all have advertising budgets.

      The console makers have got the shit mags they deserve by letting Future run (ruin) everything.

    3. Actually, as a Nintendo DS owner and someone who works in an office that subscribes to Edge, I'd like to see them being more positive in the reviews. They don't seem to give anything on the DS an enthusiastic reception lately, which is a bit out of touch with those readers who have one. It just seems like they don't like the machine much.

      I don't tend to read much else apart from the retro stuff, but I can see why Edge is considered to be the jewel in Future's crown. It's lavishly produced and has created a look that other mags (eg GamesTM) have tried and failed to emulate. I think the title aims itself more towards the games industry (and those who wish they were in it) than games players, though.